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Monday, March 02, 2009

Making room for promises...

What a wonderful weekend it's been...
I feel more rested then I have in weeks and a new sense of hope is swirling within me.
Hope for what? Well, I am not exactly sure... I am just peaceful in places that have not felt serene for quite some time.

Thank God.


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As I turn the planner pages to reveal a new week and the official beginning of business in March, I am sensing something new. Maybe it's the promise of Spring... as Life is working it's way through the soil and roots are going deeper to prepare a life source for the colorful blooms we will soon enjoy in nature.
Winter's chill and apparent dormancy was only a grand stage curtain, covering the busyness of new life's preparation. Something glorious is about to appear.

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That's it... I remember now. It's promises from long ago... even those that became too hard to believe. The ones that hurt sometimes to remember. They are pushing through the soil... and being made ready for their appearance.

As you and I make our plans for the week... and even this month, I extend to you a joyful challenge. Will you join me, in making room for your heart's desires?
Will you clear away time to do that thing you long for... or to be with the one(s) you've been waiting on?
I believe it will be worth it.

Enjoy this day... knowing that something beautiful is coming :0)

Oh God... how precious it is to ponder Your Faithfulness and to remember back on times when You've come through. Spring is on the horizon, and in my heart... I feel that it brings with it some long standing desires that have been unfulfilled until now. Receive my thanks in advance... as my heart swells with great joy just thinking about how good You are.
Lord, for all of us, who are in the waiting, for those secret things that You whispered so long ago... may you grant us peace and endow us with a patience that we can no longer conjure up on our own. It is only by Your Spirit that we can wait with joy.
Show us how, to make room for You... and the fulness that You long to bring with Your presence.
With Love and great Gratitude... in the Name of Jesus!
Amen :)

Have a beautiful day,
Tray

Sunday, March 01, 2009

Ramblings, really...

Hi there,

It's a snow day in Nashville, and I'm just not feeling the hustle and bustle this weekend... so it's music, internet and phone calls for me :)

Ella is crooning the sweetest "Sunday Kind of Love" in the background and my cup of peppermint tea is offering warm comfort to my senses. Sometimes it's nice to just stay in.

There's been alot on my mind, as always. Yet, I've chosen not to broadcast what I've written publicly, lately. Understanding that there are seasons for everything... that is about to change, once again.

I realize now, more than ever... that I was created to share my thoughts, feelings, hopes, etc. It is simply who I am... and I find that the more courage and self love that I exhibit in talking about the hard things... the more I see people around who would not normally express themselves begin to do the same.
I am also realizing that this character trait is not just about other people. It is about me.
And that is okay.

It is okay for me to do things simply because I want to.
Not because it is going to be something profound for other people.
But because it is going to be what is fulfilling to me as well.

I love that about life.
I love that about learning.

I wish I could have realized these things before now.
I wish I could have lived my whole life including myself in the picture along with everyone else.

As I move more into "dating" mode, it is so interesting to see the different characters that come into my life. It's also amazing to see the different sides of me that they bring out. How crazy is it, to live for 30 years thinking you know who you are... and then realize that there are portions of your life that you have had no clue about!

It has been so important for me to have it all together all of these years... and now all of a sudden (or maybe not so suddenly), it feels more important to be able to be vulnerable... to be a little weak.
Sharing my needs is not easy for me at all. But I find that in relationships, there is a certain necessity for allowing someone else to provide for you in the ways that they feel confident and competent.

I am learning to give what's in my heart a voice... whether or not it will be received by all... or even many. Sometimes the sharing is simply about the one who is sharing... and that's okay too.

Today, I am staying in.
Today, I am changing.
Today, I am okay.

Dear Lord,
What a jumbled up mess of a person I can be some days... yet I feel your love so close and so constant. Thank you for urging me to share today. I pray that each person reading this will know that what they hold within them is worthy of expression. Lord, we were not put here on this Earth to only offer the perfected parts of ourselves... but to extend invitations daily, to intertwine with one another. Often times, that will not be the simplest process. And even more often than that, there will be misunderstandings and parts of ourselves that are exposed that we wish could have remained hidden. Oh God, I pray that we will all give grace to one another and also to ourselves for not being perfect. May our blemishes not cause us to hide. And in the same respect, may we also not be so repulsed by the ugly parts of one another, that we push each other away. Help us, to embrace. In Jesus' Name :)

Tray